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itslikeyoureadrug
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Name: Ana
Location: United States
Birthday: 7/24/1986
Gender: Female
Interests: movies, music, art, photography, crafts, volleyball, swimming, softball, gymnastics, counting calories, restricting, marlboro milds, big sunglasses, mascara, mary kate
Expertise: evaporating like rain on my windshield, dancing in between raindrops, walking in the snow, leaving behind no footprints.
Occupation: Supervisory
Industry: Business
Message: message me
Member Since:
5/24/2005
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| Okay...short & simple...It's been 5 years since I've been here. My identity is private. I have committed to a new way of life. My goal is to find true self esteem through a healthy lifestyle. I will begin the INSANITY workout program and try to follow the nutritional guide for 5 small meals a day. I will update weight, body measurements, and daily food intake. This...is going to be the tough!!
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| It's been forever since I've written in here and since I have, I've failed so miserably. I sip my diet coke and in an ironic twist of fate, I nibble on wheat thins.
"It's like you're a demon I can't face down.
It's like I'm stuck
It's like I'm running from you all the time"
I haven't eaten in so long; my hands are cold. My perception is blurred and everyone stays the same. My illness is invisible and hopefully one day I will be.
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| Good Afternoon lovely angels!!! Thank you for all of the sweet
comments. I had a few that were not so nice and a few that were just
inquiring about my eating disorder in general. I would never wish my
personal struggles on anyone. Unless you have sat in the middle of your
kitchen for hours, crying, debating on whether or not you are deserving
of a few grapes, you do not understand the pains of anorexia. I don't
post my name or my identity beause then ana becomes more real and i
feel as though she and I are one in the same. Before I was hospitalized
the last time, I had another xanga that i posted my name and pictures
of myself and it all became too personal. I'm just another anorexic
girl. I'm sure everyone knows one...
IN OTHER NEWS....
Intake:
sugar free red bull 10 cals
2 diet cokes w/lime 0 cals
sugar free jel o cup 5 cals
4 grapes (i guess i'll say 20 cals?)
1/2 sugar free muffin 45 cals
2 celery sticks 15 cals
total: 95 cals
INFO: It takes 10 calories per pound to sustain your weight. If I
wanted to maintain my 114 lb body, i would have to consume 1140
calories a day at a consistent monthly rate.
QUESTION: When will i be happy?
updates with more thinspo after i comment....
i love you to the bones
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